Sewing room to nursery: Carpet the dogs can poop on, but the baby can’t

We finally ordered carpet for the nursery this week. I’ve wanted new carpet for this room every since we moved into the house. Anything would be better than the dog poop brown shag that is in there now. Funny how it takes a major life event to get it done.

My husband and I selected Mohawk’s Talk of the Town from the Shoreline line. We chose the flecked color to help hide future messes that will undoubtedly be created in a nursery. And we went with Mohawk because they are one of the few carpet manufacturers to offer a pet stain resistance warranty, which we need for the same reason why I know the shag carpet in there now is dog poop brown.

You can see the offending parties looking quite innocent below in a picture I took when all the sewing stuff was still in there.

But as I was reading the fine print on the warranty information I just had to laugh out loud. It reads, “also specifically excluded from this warranty is damage or stains caused by any vomit or feces, or any urine other than pet (dog and cat) urine.”

I got a funny look from the salesman, I don’t think he ever had a customer find a warranty amusing. Then the look got worse when I said, “So according to this warranty, the dog can pee on the carpet, but I can’t.”

Not that I would ever pee on the carpet of course. Well, on second thought, these days a good cough has me running to the bathroom, so I probably shouldn’t say never on that one. But if we have a boy I could see a few arcs hitting the wall, floor, window, dog, whatever else happens to be in its path.

I’m not quite sure how a carpet warranty inspector would go about telling the difference between a dog squatting where they’re not supposed to and a toddler who wrangled out of their diaper at an inopportune moment. But hopefully it won’t be a problem for us.

Either way, I just find it hilarious.